The Very Cold Day

By Guy K. Henry

www.GuyHenry.com

It wasn’t just cold. It was extremely cold! The sun was hidden behind the clouds, and that made it feel even colder. The wind whipped around and ripped away any warm air that had managed to make it this far. In short, this was a good day to stay indoors!

However, when you have dogs in your family, you have to take them outside, even on brutally cold days like this. My dogs, Peanut and Rupert had burrowed deep into the blankets where it was quite warm.

“Who wants to go WALKIES?” I called to my pups.

Nothing. My dogs are smart. They knew how cold it was outside, and decided that they would stay inside until it warmed up.

“I said WALKIES!” I repeated as I tugged on the blankets.

Slowly Peanut and Rupert came out of their cave of blankets. I put on my coat, but did not take the time to button it up, I then clipped the leashes on to my doggies and stepped out of the door.

It was even colder than I had imagined. Peanut and Rupert just stood in the doorway and looked at me as if saying, “Can we go back to bed?”

“Come on,” I said a little annoyed, “let’s go WALKIES.”

I held my coat together and tried to keep the cold wind from getting into it. My dogs slowly walked down the steps and began sniffing.

I was concentrating on the activities of my furry friends, and had not noticed the stranger sneaking up on me. Peanut and Rupert did not notice him either.

The man stood behind me and smiled. Then he took the collar of my coat and with one tug he yanked it off of me.

“Oy!” I yelled as I immediately began shivering. “Why did you do that?! Give me my coat!”

The man laughed. “You do not need a coat on a lovely day like this!” he cheerfully said.

“Are you a crazy man?” I yelled above the wind, “It is 15 degrees out here, I want my coat!”

“You are not cold,” the stranger answered, “as a matter of fact, it is very warm today, go ahead, say that it is very warm today.”

“I will not say that!” I said as my teeth chattered.

The annoying man held my coat up and said, “If you want your coat back then you will tell me what a warm day it is.”

I thought of wrestling this foolish man for my coat, but I decided to play along in hopes of quickly getting my coat back.

“Fine,” I sighed, “It is a wonderfully warm day.”

“No my friend,” the man giggled, “say it like you mean it.”

“If I do, will you give me my coat back?” I asked.

The man with my coat nodded.

“Wow!” I screamed, “I can not believe how incredibly hot it is today! The sun is beating down on me! I am sweating to death!”

Then I held my hand out, expecting my coat to be returned.

The man smiled and said, “It sounds like you don’t need your coat on such a hot day as this!”

“I NEED MY COAT!” I yelled as I lunged at the man.

He stepped back and I fell face first into the snow.

“You just think that you are cold!” the man calmly said, “If you would change your attitude, you would be nice and warm.”

I lifted my face up and brushed off the snow, “I AM FREEZING COLD!” I said with a shivering voice, “My nose is cold, my ears are cold, my hands are cold, and my whole self is COLD COLD COLD!”

“You will never get warm as long as you keep thinking like that,” the crazy man said. “Now, I want you to sing this little song:”

I am warm

I am comfortable

I am satisfied with the temperature.

And nothing, And no one, not even you, not even me

Will make me cold.

“Go ahead,” the stranger said as he dangled my coat, “and sing with me,”

So I did. I sang through my chattering teeth:

I am warm

I am comfortable

I am satisfied with the temperature.

And nothing, And no one, not even you, not even me Will make me cold.

“See,” the man said as he tossed me my coat. “You are so warm that you can put away your silly coat.”

I caught my coat, but I did not hang it up inside. I slipped my arms into it and buttoned it up this time.

“Listen to me my friend,” the strange man warned, “you are cold because you WANT to be cold. Don’t you WANT to be warm?”

I shook my head and walked away from the annoying man. After a while I turned my head towards him and yelled, “I am cold because it is just fifteen degrees out here. And smart people don’t sing songs about how warm it is, we wear coats when it is cold!”

I never saw that crazy man again.

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Are you cold? Then go ahead and put on a warm sweater or jacket.

Are you hot? How about going for a nice swim?

Are you happy? Then go skip merrily down the road and grin all the way home.

But, are you sad? Is your heart heavy? It is rare that people will advise you to have a good cry. Even rarer will they kneel beside you and cry with you.

People, even those familiar with God’s Word, will often tell someone who is sad to “turn that frown upside down” or “Smile and you’ll feel better.”

These expressions are as helpful as the crazy coat robber in my story. What is really going on when a suffering person is encouraged to wear a phony smile? Would it be more honest to say things like;

“Your difficult situation makes me uncomfortable, so CHEER UP!”

Or

“I am scared that the suffering you are now under could happen to me, so PUT ON A BIG SMILE!”

Or

“I don’t know how to help you, and that makes me uncomfortable. SEE YOU LATER!”

Do these responses bring comfort to a person who is sad? Are not they more about covering up a person’s hurt and making the comforter feel better? That seems backwards, even absurd.

Does God want us to cram our tears back into our eyes and deny that there is pain in our lives? If He did, why would he say in scripture, “Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.”? (Romans 12:15)

Why didn’t Jesus, on learning that his friend Lazarus had died, burst out laughing. Instead John records that “Jesus wept.” (John 11:35)

And if we were meant to ignore our problems and stuff our sadness, why does Solomon write that to everything there is a season, “A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;”? (Ecclesiastes 3:4)

A sad person already feels isolated. They know that something in their life is broken. When we toss quick platitudes at one whose heart is heavy, we make them feel even more alone. We highlight their dysfunction. We are not helping them.

Instead, it would be wonderful if we knew how to cry with them. That action would loudly say, “Because you are sad, I am sad too. I care about you. You are not alone.”

We don’t have to understand every aspect of a person’s problems to bring comfort to them. Just being available can begin to break down the isolation that depression brings. Offers of help, even a listening ear (that does not repeat to others what it hears) are treasured by a suffering person.

Look at Proverbs 17:17. It says, “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” A friend is a wonderful thing. But a brother or sister is even better. Notice how this verse seems to say that adversity grows friends into brothers and sisters. If you understand this, you can be that friend!

Lastly consider this; “As he that taketh away a garment in cold weather, and as vinegar upon niter[1], so is he that singeth songs to a heavy heart.” (Proverbs 25:20)